Posts Tagged ‘Game Of Thrones’

FIVE RANDOM FIVE (Game Of Thrones Edition)

August 7, 2017


Five Lesser Daenerys Targaryen Titles

The Bellicose Blonde

She Who Must Be Obeyed

Westeros’ Top Model

Queen of All Double Dragon Players

Terminator Genisys Apologist


Five George R. R. Martin Excuses For Not Writing

Windows 10 keeps crashing

Writer’s block … or brain freeze … er, which one do you get from eating ice cream?

Even I can’t keep all these meshuga characters straight

Trying to research the sex scenes but no one will have sex with me

I just love to make slobbering fanboys wait


Five Things Jon Snow Will Never Say

Enough fighting – let’s mamba!

I’m all out of Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific!

That wall looks a little high … and I’ve got a touch of vertigo.

Kiss me, Littlefinger.

Holy crap – I really do know nothing!


Five Game of Thrones Breakfast Cereals


Hodor Puffs

Unsullied Oats

Raven Bran

The Cereal Has No Name


Five Things A Dumb Guy Watching GoT Says 

I’m not sure them dragons is real.

If it’s winter why don’t they just put on a sweater?

If my sister looked like Cersei, I’d do her too.

Where the hell’s Gandalf?

I wish “Ballers” was on.




April 14, 2017

When you work in TV promotions, you are keenly aware of how difficult it is to craft a branding spot that is both entertaining and original. And when it’s done (and done well) you have to applaud. HBO’s latest (“It’s What Connects Us”) does just that with a snarky charm (cue John Oliver) that has to make you smile. Don’t get me wrong – I’ll never forgive the suits at Home Box office for cancelling Hello Ladies but I sure as hell give their marketing department props for this gem.

April 12 Trivia Rankings

April 12, 2017

What a lovely night! The weather cooperated very nicely and let’s hope it continues to oblige. So come back next week, Quizlings, and let’s enjoy the beautiful spring weather.

Meanwhile, what did learn tonight? We learned not every NC county with the name of a president was named after a president … there was life before Game Of Thrones (although few remember it) … and one of the Wright Brothers flew 852 feet on that first (fourth) flight.

Oh and there was this lively character (all you 90s kids can bring him up at your next therapy session)…

Here are this week’s team rankings. How’d you do?

How Many Lowes Would Rob Lowe Rob If Rob Lowe Could Rob Lowes? 66
United Airlines Is A Bloody Drag 65
How Was Your Vacation With Cher? 62
United Airlines – Beat Your Customers, Not The Competition 59
Council Of Ricks 58
Divided Airlines 58
United Airlines – We Put ‘Hospital’ In Hospitality 58
Men’s Wear By Lootcrate 56
Mar-A-Lago Resort And Holocaust Center 55
Enjoy Your “Vacation”, Bill 54
Fly The Friendly Skies 53
House Bill 2: Less Teams In The ACC 53
Game … Blouses 52
Queen Of Hearts 48
Ice Cream or Bust 45

Dear Santa …

December 10, 2016

Dear [insert child’s name here]:

Thank you for you recent correspondence. Unfortunately, Santa cannot answer all of the millions and billions of letters he receives each year as he is busy in his workshop getting ready for Christmas. We hope that the following will answer any and all questions you might have about Mr. Claus.

(And please visit us online at to order from our vast merchandise catalogue.)


*Who Is Santa Claus?*
Santa is a jolly fat man who delivers presents to all the good little boys and girls around the world. He is the living embodiment of the Yuletide season, the spirit of Christmas given human form.

*Does he have any other names?*
Santa is known by many names throughout the globe, including Criscringle, Father Christmas, Father Frost, Joulupukki, Kris Kringle, PPre Noël, Sabdiklos, Saint Nicolas, Sancte Claus, Sinter Klaas and Weinachtsmann. His gmail screen name is YuleLog. His CB handle is Chubby Hubby.

*Does he live at the North Pole?*
Of course not. The North Pole is really the end of the earth’s geographic axis, located at 90 North latitude, the northernmost point from which all meridians of longitude start. It lies in the Arctic Ocean and is covered with drifting pack ice, making settlement by Santa or anyone else highly unlikely. (This is not to be confused with the magnetic North Pole, which in 1993 lay at about 78 27’N, 104 24’W, or with the geomagnetic North Pole, which is at about 79 13’N, 71 16’W. Huge killer frost bees live at these locations, making human occupation difficult.)

*Do elves make Santa’s toys?*
Santa no longer uses elves as his primary labor, due to the Pixie/Sprite/Elf/Brownie Emancipation Act of 1973 (UN General Statute 87292). Most of Santa’s labor is now farmed out to third world countries and unregistered sweatshops.

*What does Santa do when it’s not Christmas?*
Primarily, he binge watches Netflix (Bloodline and Lady Dynamite are personal faves). However, Santa has been known to dabble in origami, Suidoku and cross-stitch. He also hosts a Game Of Thrones podcast and writes Pretty Little Liars fan fiction.

September 21 Trivia Rankings

September 21, 2016

What a night! If you weren’t there, Quizlings, you missed out! Everyone got a free gallon of gas – just for showing up to play! Sorry you missed it. Oh well…

Reminder: Next week is the finale of our 7th anniversary celebration! We’ll hold the raffle for a night out (hotel/dinner) and play some special games and maybe a little surprise or two. The point is: do not miss it! Fun is only the least awesome thing that’ll happen.

This week was all about bones and toys and Emmys and poutine. Mmmmmm … poutine.

Remember to bring a newbie next week (last week) to get an extra raffle ticket. One extra per Quizling. But your teammates can bring a newbie. And your newbie can bring a newbie. Take advantage of it while it lasts! (Newbies and Quizlings must be 18 to take part in raffle. All newbies are on the honor system.)

Now, here are this week’s trivia rankings:

Iron Wolves 65
The Art Of The Self Deal 64
Skittles Don’t Kill People… 61
We Used Our Last Gallon of Gas To Get To Trivia 61  (tie)
Do Twins Ever Realize One Of Them Was Unplanned? 61  (tie)
Running On Fumes 58
Divorce Is The Pitts 57
We’d Come Up With Something Clever But We Ran Out Of Gas 54
Sent With Invisble Ink 54
I’ve Got Gas 52
Crash 49
Actually, We Ended The Birther Conversation 42
3 Muska-Beers 39

June 29 Trivia Rankings

June 29, 2016

Well, it’s official – the weather hates us. Whatcha gonna do?

Well, no reason to tarry, Quizlings. Here are the rankings for the week…

Drumpfexit 68
The Brexit Club 68
With Or Without EU 64
Pizza Toppings Or Team Name? We Don’t Have Time For Both 64
Sausage Party 63
The EU Has One GB Of Free Space 63
Let Them Eat Ice Cream 59
Funner: Gooder Than Fun 59
It’s Polite To Hodor 59
Ben Simmons Is On Our Team … No Autographs Please 56
Hawaiians 55
Team Name Is The Only Prize We Get 53
Prediction: Last Place 53
Copa America Was Messi 52
(Spoiler) R+L=J 52
Next Union To Exit Is FIFA 50
Working Harder Than An Ugly Stripper 49
Walking Talking Stephen Hawking 48
Brexit, The Destroyer of Your 401Ks 46
5 Of Diamonds, Your Order Is Ready 39
Trail of Beers 34
I Ain’t Afraid Of No Ghost 31
Trial By Combat 30

FIVE RANDOM FIVE (Halloween Edition)

October 31, 2015

Five Costume Mashups

Colonel Bernie Sanders


Elton Jon Snow

Paula Deen Martin

Free Willy Nelson

Five Candies From Hell

Possessed Sour Patch Kids



Reese’s Feces

Circus Peanuts

Five Halloween Douchebags

People who give out toothbrushes instead of candy

Idiots who decry holiday as evil or demonic

Mean-spirited vandals

Yokels who turn yard displays into thinly veiled racist slurs or political statements

Teenagers who are too old to trick or treat but still do

Five Great Pumpkin Fears

Kids will stop believing in him

Someone will kill him and make the world’s largest pumpkin pie

The Easter Bunny will have more Twitter followers

Dying alone and unloved

Linus will break his restraining order

Five Things Kids Don’t Want To Hear When Trick or Treating

“We’re out of candy.”

“Another Elsa. How @#%&ing original, brat.”

“Instead of candy, I’m giving out hugs!”

“You can’t come in without a warrant.”

“Why, yes, I am Jared Fogle.”