Posts Tagged ‘Dogs’

June 27 Trivia Rankings

June 28, 2018

Thanks to everyone who came out to play this week. For those who didn’t (shame!), a special note and reminder: No Tomato Jake’s Trivia next week due to Independence Day (the holiday, not the movie).  See everybody in two weeks as the Dog Days Of Trivia continue!

Meanwhile, this week was all about Sanrio kitties, cinematic culinary clashes and wire-to-wire ball clubs. Also, there was this canine champ…

Now here are this week’s rankings. See how your team did!

The FDA Says I Should Smoke Now 68
Things Better With Beard Hair: Glen 66
No Soup For You, Sarah! 64
Team Names Are Really Hard 62
Jake Says My Shirt Is Not “Felt” Enough 62
Shh! We have A Sleeping Baby 61
Allison’s Birthday 60
Eric Trump For Inferior Court 60
Germany Got Das Boot 56
Only One In Dog Beers 54
Ashley, A Little Help With the Score, Please 51
The Bigs Boys V4 50
Fuzzy Wuzzy Was A Woman? 44
2 Guys Who Don’t Know Squat 39
The Supreme Court Nominees 36
Kevin Needs A Raise 31
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Bow Wow – Whoa!

June 23, 2018

Here’s an ad for a very special toy. It’s a cute little Dachshund. A doggie that apparently needs to go walkies.

By the way, it’s German – does that make it any more comforting? No, of course not.

People I Hate #704 (In A Series)

May 5, 2018

Who: Mother Hubbard

Why: She starved her dog, plain and simple. Oh sure, she goes to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone but when the nursery rhyme is ended the dog has none because the cupboard is bare. So either the old crone goes through the motions, knowing full well the cupboard is empty, or she’s a forgetful cow who’s honestly yet ridiculously shocked to find that no one magically stocked her larder. Either way, the dog was about to get a bone and not a can of Alpo or some Puppy Chow.

How I justify it: She’s neglecting her pet. People who abuse, neglect or otherwise let pets come to harm through inaction deserve our collective hatred and scorn. The only upside is that when the senile biddy starves her pooch beyond the canine’s ability to cope he’s gonna chow down on her frail old bones like Louie Anderson at a Golden Corral buffet.

March 28 Trivia Rankings

March 29, 2018

What a lovely night, Quizlings! I think spring may actually have sprung after all. Thanks to all the humans who came out to play – and an extra special thank you to Booker (enjoy those Milkbones, my friend). We’ll do it again next week and all the Wednesdays to come. Spread the word and come back for more triviawesomness.

PLEASE take a moment to nominate us for Best Trivia in Durham County over at indyweek.com. Much appreciated.

This week was all about Old English lit, kitty digits and South Park promos. And to answer your question “What’s a ‘Night Ranger’ anyway?” – – this, THIS is a Night Ranger…

Now let’s see how your team did this week.

Kim Jong-un’s Midnight Train To China 69
Some Bunny Loves You 64
Stormy With A Chance Of Indictment 64
What’s A “Night Ranger” Anyway? 63
SpringBreakWoooo 60
Periodic Table Dancers 59
Don’t Shoot Me, Bro 56
YOLO JK BRB – – Jesus 55
Savage Potato Nerdfaces 50
And Then There Were Four 47
Stormy Days Ahead For Trump 47
Uhhhhhhhhh 46
I’m So Excited For Spring I Wet My Plants 43
Millennium Sam Wilson 42
This Pizza Tastes Better Than Beyonce’s Face 38
Denim Jackets and T-Shirts 38
Mama T and Fun 37
I Drink And I Know Things 34

February 21 Trivia Rankings

February 22, 2018

Thanks, Quizlings, for making it a great evening of Tomato Jake’s Wednesday Night Trivia! The weather was cooperative, we learned about the Winter Olympics and we had the first dog of the year in attendance (yay, Woodley!).

Along the way, we sussed out some cephalopod species, found Friends follow-ups and gobbled gross gaming agates. And there was this celluloid masterpiece of yesteryear…

Now let’s check out the rankings for the week and see how your team stacked up against the competition.

Off The Podium 67
Salchow Nip Slip 66
We Started This Cher S#!+ 65
The Crew Crushes Trivia 61
Sparky Still Won’t Follow Me On Twitter 59
Clothes Aren’t The Only Thing Being Stripped In Louisville 58
Army Of Two 57
We’re Hoping To Do Better Than Fergie 56
Two Kids In An Overcoat Posing As An Adult 55
Francis Scott Off-Key 54
The North Korean Olympic Cheerleaders 53
Destroying Trivia Like Fergie Did The Anthem 51
Pyeong F. Chang’s 51
I Can’t Explain Witchcraft 51
Trivia Athletes From Russia 51
Mr. Musk: Mars Magnate 48
No Collusion 47
Periodic Table Dancers 47
My Drinking Team Has A Trivia Problem 43

Tales From My Screwed-Up Childhood #12

January 13, 2018

When I was a kid, I had a dog named Ringo. He was an older dog and I was really young – about three or four – when Ringo became ill and had to be put to sleep. Of course, my idiot parents didn’t want to tell me that, so they made up a story. No, not the “he went to live on a farm” one. I was told that Ringo had been taken to the vet but he had escaped from his cage and run out into the road and then been hit by a car. I have no idea how any adult could think that was the better white lie for a preschooler, but that’s the family in which I was raised.

Begins to explain a lot about me, eh?

CSI: Crime Seuss Investigation

December 15, 2017

It is with sad regret that I must report on the passing of a beloved holiday icon.

Dr. Seuss’ Grinch, one-time Christmas stealer, was found dead in his mountain home near Whoville early last Saturday. The coroner’s report attributed his death to an enlarged heart.

Whoville M.E., Quincy Q. Who, noted that some physiological change had apparently occurred within the last twenty-four hours causing the Grinch’s heart to grow as much as three times its normal size. “Normally, a Grinch’s heart is a very small muscle; one could say an empty hole.” He went on to explain, “Their cardiovascular systems are not very well developed at all.”

The catalyst that supposedly caused this heart malfunction remains unknown, although sources report that, sometime before his death, the Grinch consumed a large quantity of Whovian Roast Beast, causing his cholesterol levels to rise to an enormous rate.

The Grinch is survived by an unnamed dog and Cindy Lou, his common law wife.

Random Neurons Firing

October 3, 2017

My mind is really a scary place. It’s like an attic so filled with clutter that you daren’t set foot inside lest you risk damage by a towering mound of Christmas decorations from 1986. Open it up and who knows what will come tumbling out.

For instance, I’m in bed the other night. I’m reading, finishing off What Happened … I stayed up much, much too late (as usual) and was merely whiling away the minutes until slumber. Eventually I drift off to sleep.

Then bam! Suddenly I’m wide awake! I’ve been asleep for less than 30 minutes but now I’m alert and panicked and my heart is beating a mile a minute. I can’t fall back to sleep and I stay awake for an hour. And one thought keeps bouncing round my noggin like a pea in an oil drum:

Whatever happened to that guy in those coffee commercials who was hitchhiking across America with his dog? Did he make it? Is he still traveling? Did he fall on hard times and have to eat his dog like Lewis and Clark did? Who knows the answer? Can I do a Google search?

Sigh. Pretty pathetic, I know. But it’s my mind and welcome to it.

The Dog Days Are Here!

September 26, 2017

This Wednesday, we’re wrapping up Tomato Jake’s Wednesday Night Trivia’s 8th Anniversary celebration with a raffle – and it’s still not too late to get in on the fun!

The raffle will be for, among other things, a free night’s stay for two at a nifty Durham hotel. You get one raffle ticket just for playing (one per week). The raffle is only open to Quizlings 18 and above due to the nature of the prize.

You can also pick up extra raffle tickets for bringing a newbie, posting a flier to our trivia night and donating a new dog toy for our canine pals. How many extra raffle tickets? Two per item! And there’s no limit this week on how many of each you can claim. Seriously! Bring 56 newbies and get 112 extra raffle tickets! Post 139 fliers (and show me proof) and get 278 extra raffle tickets! Bring 3,861 new dog toys to donate to the pooches on the patio and get 7,722 extra – and I’m out of tickets. Crap, I didn’t think this through. Well, let’s cap them all “within reason” and see how it goes, okay? But the main idea is to bring someone who’s never played trivia at Jake’s before, post fliers to alert the unfamiliar and bring new dog toys because there’s nothing like seeing a dog smile.

smile

Spread the word! Bring your friends! Bring your enemies (best to keep them closer)! Just help us celebrate 8 years of fantastic trivia at Tomato Jake’s Pizzeria!

September 20 Trivia Rankings

September 20, 2017

Thanks to all who showed up to play. Raffle tickets a-plenty were given out to all who played and to some with pet pics and doggy toys. More next week, so stay tuned.

What did you miss? Winning streaks, test-your-limits cinema and Caribbean islands. Plus there was this haunting theme…

Now here are this week’s team rankings. See you next week, Quizlings!

Kevin Hart’s Sex Tape Is Kind Of Short 63
Maybe He’ll Have an Impeachment Parade 62
Trump at U.N. Means F.U.U.N. 61
We’re Following You, But Not On Twitter 60
Nambia Is Where They Grow The Covfefe 60
Pink And Purple 59
We Bull-ieved 59
No, That One 56
The League of Nations 54
Couch Pulls Out But I Don’t 54
West Side Story 2: Maria’s Revenge 54
Will Trade Brownies For Right Answers 52
We Brought A Foreigner 51
That Table Over There 46
Charlie’s Heroes 46
There’s No U In Team Either 41
My Teachers Are Here – Help! 40
Taco Truckers 39
How Do You Solve A Problem Like Maria? 38
Los Narcos 29