March 8 Trivia Rankings

A fun night, Quizlings. We talked of Instagram stars, Clue weapons and an unfortunate sports outing. Plus we answered some questions with a question, didn’t we?

And there was this tasty morsel …

Here are this week’s trivia rankings. How’d you do?

Wikileaks Gave Us Our Answers	66
A Day Without A Woman: Glen Knows Too Well	66
The Ceiling Is The Roof	65
A Castle Is Not A Chess Piece	65
Trump Tower Tapp Room	64
Obama Tapped That	61
A Day Without Women = Day Without Brownies	61
Trout Mask Replica	60
Why Doesn’t Oedipus Curse? He Kisses His Mama With That Mouth	57
Ten Of Diamonds	56
Check The Forecast … ‘Snow Joke	55
Wire Tapping For Dummies	55

FIVE RANDOM FIVE

Five Produce Items That Sound Vaguely Dirty

Parsnips

Leeks

Beets

Butternut Squash

Melons

 

Five Signs Your Tax Preparer Is An Idiot

When audited, pretends he can’t speak English

Thinks IRS is sexually transmitted

Got his degree on Craigslist

Let’s you deduct your Doctor Who DVDs as a medical expense

On your federal return, lists your occupation as “job”

 

Five Lesser Known New Elon Musk Inventions

A unicycle with two wheels

Superglue that doubles as a contraceptive

Can opener that cats can’t hear

A reverse turducken

An air guitar that actually plays music

 

Five Board Game Character Ailments

Gramma Nutt, Candyland – Diabetes

Lizzie Hippo, Hungry Hungry Hippos – Bulimia

Rich Uncle Pennybags, Monopoly – Gout

Cavity Sam, Operation – Hypochondria

Colonel Mustard, Clue – Herpes (contracted in a library tryst with Miss Scarlet)

 

Five Odd Relationship Dealbreakers

She doesn’t know Esperanto

He bathes like a cat

His wardrobe consists exclusively of concert tees and jorts

During sex, she insists you wear an Alex Trebek mask and only answer in the form of a question

You say “to-MAH-toh” and he says, “Why the hell are you talking like that?”