Five Days The Music Died
Buddy Holly’s plane crash (1959)
John Lennon’s assassination (1980)
KISS goes make-up free (1983)
The “Soy Bomb” incident (1998)
The release of Kevin Federline’s album (2008)
Five Nursery Rhyme Characters That Are Dicks
Old King Cole
Wee Willie Winkie
Georgie Porgie
Little Jack Horner
Cock Robin
Five Reasons To Watch “Keeping Up With The Kardashians”
Lost a bet
Easily swayed by pop culture icons
Remote went missing – can’t change channel
Your family looks like saints compared to these vain, talentless famewhores
Haven’t been the same since that mule kicked you in the head
Five Puzzling & Regrettable Cracker Jack Prizes
An opened ketchup packet
Gangrene
Sawdust
A crude drawing of Seth Meyers
A smaller, tinier box of Cracker Jacks
Five Signs You’ll Never Be Nominated For An Academy Award
Your movie was shot on your phone in your parent’s basement
Your “animated short” is nothing but a VHS of an old Popeye cartoon
The screenplay was adapted from a Denny’s menu
Sound track consists solely of fart noises
Your name is Vin Diesel
Tags: Academy Awards, Buddy Holly, Cracker Jack, John Lennon, Kardashians, KISS, Nursery Rhymes, Vin Diesel
