FIVE RANDOM FIVE

Five Overrated Things

The Voice

Girl Scout Cookies

IMAX

Adele

Emojis

 

Five Breakfast Cereal Mascot Fears

Fear of scurvy – Cap’n Crunch

Fear that Snap will kill him in his sleep – Pop

Fear of being institutionalized – Sonny the Cuckoo Bird

Fear of Irish stereotypes – Lucky the Leprechaun

Fear of dentist Walter Palmer – Tony the Tiger

 

Five Game Shows In Hell

The Price Is Right Up Your Colon

Name That Festering Mass

Squeal Or No Squeal

Who Wants To Be Chamillionaire?

Cash Cab

 

Five Rejected Care Bears

Sleazytime Bear

Inoperable Bear

Big Hairy Bear

Exeunt Pursued By Bear

Shhh! Our Little Secret Bear

 

Five Ways The World Would Be Different If Pop-Tarts Were Legal Tender

Kellogg’s would be the new US Mint

Banks would smell awesome

“Crazy Good” replaces “In God We Trust”

Anyone caught with Toaster Strudel would be jailed for counterfeiting

I would be broke because I’d eat my entire savings account

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