I had a dream last night that I was watching Real Time with Bill Maher. It was a pretty ordinary episode except Bill Maher’s guests were Santa Claus, Ebeneezer Scrooge, Jesus Christ and Carrot Top. Of course, Santa was being his usual jovial self. Jesus was cordial enough, but he kept trying to accuse Kringle of stealing focus away from the true meaning of the season (him). Scrooge, meanwhile, had his own conservative agenda and he kept blaming everything on the Obama administration.
Carrot Top was just a buffoon and basically got on everyone’s nerves.
I think what disturbed me so much about this dream wasn’t the religious iconography or the anti-Yule motif. No, the most disturbing aspect of the dream was that everyone, including Maher, was dressed as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And not a single person mentioned it in the least.
It’s time’s like this I wish my therapist would give out his home number.