Five Word That Kind Of Sound Like Mattress
Five Hidden Dangers In Your Home
That new lamp that looks suspiciously like a ninja
Five Rejected Prom Themes
This Tragic Moment
Sparringtime in Paris
Date With Desenex
A Ted Knight To Remember
Night of 1,000 Stares
Five Reasons I Hate MTV
They stopped airing music videos
They wouldn’t hire me
They cancelled Beavis & Butt-head
Tabitha Soren never responded to my love letters
Jesse Camp, Jackass, Teen Mom, Jersey Shore – seriously, do I need to go on?
Five Flash Pick-Up Lines
I like fast girls.
Don’t tell anyone … but my secret identity is Brad Pitt.
What has two thumbs and owns a cosmic treadmill? THIS guy!
Yeaaaaah, I know Aquaman.
I’m only the fastest man alive when I’m fighting crime, if ya know what I mean.