IHOPping Mad

Are you kidding me? I missed Free Pancake Day AGAIN?! What the hell, IHOP? Send out some mailers, take out some full page ads in the newspaper … heck, skywrite the promotion all across the country or laser it on the face of the moon. Just spread the bloody word, okay? Don’t assume we all just magically know or anything. ‘Cuz I would have so been there, y’know? Eatin’ pancakes. FOR FREE. Now, all I got is shattered dreams and a Mrs. Butterworth fetish that still just freaks the holy hell outta Moira and actually caused her to packs her bags once and take the kids to her sister Saoirse’s place for a week until I “came to my senses.” But now I’ve shared too much. Something that would not have happened if I HAD GOTTEN A FREE SHORT STACK IN MY GOB A FEW DAYS AGO!!!!!!!

So. Lemme know next year. All’s I’m sayin’.


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