Daddy May Care

My son saw Toy Story for the first time when he was 8 and couldn’t sleep because he thought his toys would come alive at night and kill him. Of course, he finally fell asleep after about an hour and later that night I snuck into his room and rearranged his stuffed toys and Transformers. As a result, he wouldn’t sleep in his room for about three weeks and he eventually gathered all his toys in a sack and tossed them onto a fire. It cost me about $200 to replace the toys and a few thousand for the ensuing therapy but one day a long time from now – when he’s in high school and throws a Project X party or at college and needs me to bail him out of jail – I’m gonna let him know exactly what I did and laugh like a bloody maniac.

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