I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus. Just a cute kiddie song? Hardly. The little brat singing the ditty is all a-titter that his mom’s liplocking old St. Nick – y’know, just pasting a big one on the Jolly Old Elf – snogging Father Christmas right good. The kid has no earthly idea that it’s his own dad, right? In fact, the little dipwad opines, “What a laugh it would have been if Daddy had only seen Mommy kissing Santa Claus last night?” Ya think, doofus? Oh yeah, I’m sure Pops would have been pleased as punch to catch his wife making out with another guy, Spirit of Christmas or not. Let’s face it – if the kid is correct in any sense and it’s not his old man in a fake beard playing tonsil hockey that means “Mommy” is, at best, a flirt and a cheat or, at worst, whoring herself out to get the kid his Christmas presents.

Face it. Your entire childhood is one seriously screwed up pastiche of Freudian mishigas.

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