Party Foul

Here’s a fun thing to do. Tell your kid that there’s a surprise birthday party for a cousin or friend of a friend or distant relative – someone the kid doesn’t know. Then take him or her to a Toys ‘R’ Us and look around for a present. Spend a long time looking and get something really cool you know your kid would like. Go home, wrap the present and make your child take a bath and get all dressed up. Then drive the young one over to Chuck E. Cheese or some fun park or bouncy castle party place and go inside. When you ask where the party for the cousin or whoever is, they staff will of course say that there isn’t one. You can then pretend to get really angry like you just wasted a whole day for nothing and then you can smash up the toy present and drag your kid back home and make him do chores. Ha ha ha ha! That would be pretty darn funny, right? No, no, wait. Er, no, not funny, what’s the word? Ah… cruel! Yep, pretty darn cruel. Heh heh. Yeeeeah. Well, whatever floats your boat. I got issues.

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