People I Hate #205 (In A Series)

Who: The pinhead who says “Virginny ham” in the radio ad.

Why: It’s for some sub shop and he’s talking about how his subs are so fresh and how the ingredients are so special and he throws this out – Vir-ginny ham – like this Southern jargon is gonna hip you to how awesome and regional the product is. For about two seconds I gave him the benefit of the doubt and thought perhaps it was a brand name but nope. It’s Virginia ham, dipwad. Virginny makes it sound like he’s not just eating that ham – or worse, he’s got a veeeeery special relationship with the pig. Look, I don’t speak yokel and I don’t think some toddler-tongue dialectical variation makes your product sound charming.

How I justify it: I went to school and got a decent education so I don’t need to speak down to people or, conversely, be spoken down to. Plus, we don’t live in an episode of The Beverly Hillbillies, well doggie.

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